September 27, 2022 | By Angie Fitch
Introduction from the IAES Blog Team:
The staff at IAES is proud to share with you a poem written by an amazing AE warrior that has been battling AE since the Fall of 2020. Each one of us feel the emotions, the ups and downs and roller coaster like ride AE takes us on. Thank you, Angie, for so eloquently putting pen to paper the feelings we all share!
Good, bad, up, down, round and round.
I feel as though I’m on a merry-go-round.
Full of uncertainty if it will ever stop spinning; Full of frustration as I remain on my couch sitting.
I just want to live.
I just want to die.
I just want to do more than just survive.
I just want this nightmare to finally subside.
Convincing others and myself to remain positive and hopeful, when deep down inside I feel the opposite and woeful.
Confused, angry and sad is what I feel; But never reveal; All I can do is hope that I heal.
Why me, why now, why at all? The pity party sets in as I continue to fight and pray that I don’t give in.
The fatigue, the limitations, the pain and loss of ambition; The debilitating life that I have been given.
I will live; I will thrive; I will ultimately win and survive; This is what I tell myself; This is what I tell others as my pain remains undercover.
My strength then comes back; It’s going to be alright; it’s going to be okay; I will continue the fight day to day; I will keep the hope and learn to cope; I will continue my way up this slippery slope with hopes of support and love of some sort.
Your generous Donations allow IAES to continue our important work and save lives!
Become an Advocate by sharing your story. It may result in accurate diagnosis for someone suffering right now who is yet to be correctly identified. Submit your story with two photos to IAES@autoimmune-encephalitis.org
International Autoimmune Encephalitis Society (IAES), home of the AEWarrior®, is the only Family/Patient-centered organization that assists members from getting a diagnosis through to recovery and the many challenges experienced in their journey. Your donations are greatly appreciated and are the direct result of IAES’ ability to develop the first product in the world to address the needs of patients, Autoimmune Encephalitis Trivia Playing Cards. Every dollar raised allows us to raise awareness and personally help Patients, Families, and Caregivers through their Journey with AE to ensure that the best outcomes can be reached. Your contribution to our mission will help save lives and improve the quality of life for those impacted by AE.
For those interested in face masks, clothing, mugs, and other merchandise, check out our AE Warrior Store! This online shop was born out of the desire for the AE patient to express their personal pride in fighting such a traumatic disease and the natural desire to spread awareness. Join our AE family and help us continue our mission to support patients, families and caregivers while they walk this difficult journey.